《婚姻的意义》读书笔记

我觉得这本书很好的一个资讯就是:按照圣经的教导,很明确的给出了婚姻的定义。书本中充满了许多“婚姻是…”, “婚姻不是…”的描述,很好的帮助我们明确婚姻里各种红绿灯。我在读书的过程中也将这些摘录下来,可以很好的帮我们调整自己的婚姻预期。

因为最近越来越遇到身边的人,当然还有自己在这个问题上许多不能明白。这本书也已经被推荐了N次。所以本着激励自己,同时造福各位的原则,开始读书并整理一些笔记。希望大家可以互相探讨,及时调整自己在这个除了和上帝以外最重要的人际关系上的偏差。装备好自己,找到伙伴继续打怪~~

这本书有中英两版,把封面放下下面,国内淘宝还是可以买到的。

序言

第一章

Q: 什么是合得来的伴侣?你认为合得来是怎么定义的?
柏拉图在Symposium说道,按古希腊神话人类原先是雌雄同体,每个人有4手4脚,两套生殖,和一个两张脸的头。这种“人”成了奥林匹斯神的威胁,所以宙斯把人分成两半。于是,有了人们一直寻求自己迷失的另一半,重新合二为一的想法。

但是实际上,Marriage is two broken people coming together to find healing in Jesus.

婚姻的意义不在于找到我们缺失的另一半,而是互相帮助成为上帝计划的一部分。

所以,合得来应该是在神的安排下合得来,过一个属神的生活而不觉得尴尬奇怪,一切自然。但是又有神的教导在每天的生活中。

Q: 如何处理深入了解后的爱情疲劳?

认识到每个人都有罪,若有人自以为虔诚,却不勒住他的舌头,反欺哄自己的心,这人的虔诚是虚的。我觉得从起初基督徒的婚姻就应该建立在彼此每天祷告的基础上,应该在幸福的时候建立良好的沟通渠道。

我觉得如果进入到“原来你是这样的某某某”状态。应该冷静,尝试沟通问题,不要用你怎么这样来回答,而是你这样可能让我感到不是很舒服,开心。再亲密关系中,应该一开始就很有安排的沟通一些问题(应该有list),从而避免发生后来冲突的情况。

而且婚姻中还有责任。在学习耶稣的方式上要舍己。

Q:你会对婚姻理想化或者悲观化吗?读完这一章有改变你的想法吗?

更加实际的人是吧。

Q: 婚姻的奥秘是什么?

耶稣为了爱而放弃了自己。现今社会放弃一些东西确实很容易,但是我们应该学会去做一些这样的事。

婚姻里面还怕什么?离婚怎么办?要学会冷静的be myself。

第二章 婚姻的力量

  • 我们要注意,基督中婚姻的前提:夫妻双方都被圣灵充满。
  • NO: 婚姻不是两个匮乏的人,不晓得自己的价值和目标,在彼此的臂弯里寻找人生的意义。
  • 夫妻关系中最困难重要的任务:都要为对方而活,不能只顾自己。
  • 我们不需要通过不停地服侍和工作来赢得自我价值。
  • 自我中心是婚姻的癌症,其特点是:没耐心,容易发怒,讲话刻薄,缺乏恩慈,嫉妒,怀怨。
  • YES:婚姻需要服侍别人,摆脱自我中心。持续把对方的幸福放在自己的幸福之前,才能找到自己的幸福。
  • ?如果我们试图把“追求自己的幸福”摆在前面,把“顺服神”放在后面,那就是违逆自己的本性。
  • 顺服在军事中的比喻很好。一个极端的情况:失去自己,成为整体的一部分。
  • 我们受伤的经历会加重我们的自我中心。
  • 为自己的而活实际上有问题。
  • 自卑的人和自傲的人都是自我中心。63

優勝美地3天2夜放空活動

打算組織一次優勝美地公園的戶外放空活動,時間安排在7月29週五到7月30日週日。

基本計畫:

目前Todd在Curry Village有預定兩個 cabin, 8張床(內部情況大致可以看下面video),從7月29日週五到7月31日週日check out。

Curry Village地處優勝美地中心,吃飯,徒步,都很方便。

裝備

一雙比較好的登山鞋

登山杖

背包水袋 https://www.amazon.com/KUYOU-Hydration-Rucksack-Backpack-Climbing/dp/B01C5O9T50/ref=cs_sr_dp?keywords=picking%2Bwater%2Bbag&qid=1658109333&sr=8-23&th=1

睡袋, 如果有最好

比較厚的外套,晚上會冷。

保暖內衣,晚上洗澡後可以穿

頭燈:https://www.amazon.com/Victoper-Headlamp-Lightweight-Waterproof-Flashlight/dp/B09MCMVZS9/ref=sr_1_7?keywords=headlight&qid=1658205197&sr=8-7

墨鏡

防曬

對講機:超級好物啊,營地至寶。https://www.amazon.com/Motorola-T100TP-Talkabout-Radio-Pack/dp/B01DM7AEF8/ref=sr_1_26?crid=389WKI0RFIABW&keywords=walky+talky&qid=1658206081&sprefix=walky%2Caps%2C223&sr=8-26

藍牙音箱

行程

週五 7/29

早上6點出發,9點左右前到達。週五主題吃吃吃。打算搶佔available的BBQ rack,然後把帶的燒烤食物烤著吃。我們也可以參觀一下 下瀑布的一個trail。還有在湖邊淌水。

很漂亮的一個營地
tent 內部,很乾淨

這個瀑布的trail爬各種石頭過去還是蠻有意思的。

週六 7/30

今天來爬非常有特色的Vernal Fall and Nevada Fall Trails。大約4個小時,但是山頂的風景真的非常美麗壯觀。

下午下山泉水泡腳,晚上我們可以考慮去著名的Ahwahnee酒店感受一下。著名電影 閃靈 的內部取景就在這家酒店。晚上酒店有篝火的故事會,可以坐下來聽聽看。

週日 7/31

睡個飽覺回程啦。

San Jose 南湾挖青口贝活动

4月到来,鱼季也开始了。特此欢迎大家有空,趁今年海水低潮之日,来参加4月23日周六的挖青口的活动。这个活动大人小孩都合适,也在海滩边。下面给出一些具体细节。

写在前面:挖贝壳很爽,但是小朋友一定要看好。自己也不要去浪太大的地方哦。

地点:Pescadero State Beach, 在南湾这边,注意有两个入口,我们要去南边那个可以跨海上潮汐岛的。所以应该是沿着Pescadero Creek Rd 到海边。

4月23日当天计划

9:00am 在CCIC-Cupertino母堂集合或者自己直接前往Pescadero State Beach
10:00am 在沙滩集合,希望可以拿到岸边的三张木桌,有弟兄会摆好桌子。
10:30am 可以趁低潮上岛(右图红圈)开挖(小朋友也可以上岛挖,家长请看护好),也可以在海边游玩。
12:00pm 清洗青口贝,开火煮。
12:30pm 沙滩午餐。
13:15pm 唱歌,分享,游戏。
14:30pm 回程

具体位置信息

如图所示,我们停车在C处,A处有3张木桌用来set up,B处我们用来挖我们的青口贝。

建议装备

坚固小刀一个用来从岩石上割青口贝,有老手推荐了这个:

感觉和🔨应该差不多?
折叠椅
花园手套作为防护
可以下水的鞋,岛上还是要穿鞋比较好
外套保暖
防晒

如果希望打一桶回家,请准备鱼证一份和塑料桶,一人可以拿10lb。

貌似海滩风景还是很不错,看这个博主的照片

如果有兴趣参与,开启加州吃货的夏天,请找CCIC-Sunnyvale的朋友拉你进群啦。

感觉好好吃~~

We are what we choose to be

Today is May 6, 2017. I am working half a day on the project so later the app can make change irrelevant to the data set. From experiment to implementation, and error searching and debugging, days like today run though my mind, and this kind of feeling is what I endurance for the past 2 years.

It is always about focusing on one problem and cannot do anything else besides it. This can be applied to any other domain, such as job hunting, paper writing. I think this is what my advantages: Focus. But it is also my weakness if this happens very often in my daily life. This is bad if it is 24/7 since I will be very skill at doing one thing, but lose the big picture of the work, even life.

Even PhD study, as I think, is not only about concentration in my tiny region. It needs a deep understanding of one domain, and at the mean time to explore other domains for new idea.

That is why I feel my start-up life is not good for me. It has majorly been a journey about learning new things, which is not very applicable to a general knowledge. This is especially obvious when I prepare for CV/CG related job hunting. I think my start-up job do give me a very advanced vision on the topic and that is really what I appreciate. However, life and work balance is also critical in the long run. Besides, in my specific domain, I work alone for the 2 years, I do need communication to break for new idea and better solution. Learning alone is not a good habit.

The past two months really show the true face of living in real world rather than the irony tower. Making plan and do multiple things in pieces of time is what I try to do in the future.

I am a little regretful for that I am not brave enough to choose the way to do face. I hope I can have chance to do it but I do feel I should start with a more general topic. Face could be my side project especially when I get so many resources on the possible way to do it. But the job is the highest priority, after so many years, I think I come back to where I begin, and this time I hope I can polish my skill and create something elegant and useful.

Start with deep learning

So finally get the grit to try some deep learning framework. This post tries to cover the basic installation tips to install Ubuntu 16+ on a ASUS ROG laptop with Torch deep learning framework so we can try the facebook’s DeepMask+SharpMask.

  1. Install Ubuntu. I choose to create a USB installer for this. Win32DiskImager is a good tool to create the install image.
  2. For ASUS ROG, some fast boot feature needs to be off so linux can be boot up. Please check online to set the bios.
  3. Look at this post from Taiwan for tips especially about installing Video card driver. Just in case, I leave the code for the Nvidia driver here:sudo apt-get purge nvidia*
    sudo apt-get purge bumblebee* primus
    sudo add-apt-repository ppa:graphics-drivers/ppa
    sudo apt-get update
    sudo apt-get install nvidia-352 nvidia-prime
    sudo add-apt-repository -r ppa:bumblebee/stable
  4. On Youtube, there is a very good tutorial about how to install dual boot system so Ubuntu and Win 10 can run together. In my case, I have the Win 10 installed on the 500G SSD so I get the entire linux on a 200 GB partition of my 1TB data disk. My experience proves that following this video tutorial you should be OK to get a dual boot-able system after that. Since I don’t need to hibernate linux normally and I have enough RAM, I set swap as 2GB and just keep all the other 198 GB for the system.
  5. Do remember to follow the post in 3 for the Video card update since the facebook deepmask needs Nvidia GPU with compute power 3.5+, by default, Ubuntu will use the Intel integrated graphics card so install the Nvidia driver is necessary.
  6. Now you can follow the Torch web page to install Torch, just like the facebook deep mask page suggests.
  7. Notice that even after you installed the torch, you need CUDA package and other stuff to run the demo.
  8. First, you need to install the CUDA SDK so the cutorch can be installed. Follow the link here at Nvidia for how to install CUDA SDK. Then you just need to go to torch folder in your system and type : luarocks install cutorch, it should work like charm. Please follow the pre and pose installation guide since the command will be different based on your system. To get the correct CUDA SDK, go to here.

Unity development environment set-up

To start the development of Unity, especially with Vuforia, will be an excited learning opportunity for me this year. I hope I can get a good knowledge in this game engine. I feel that we will be successful today and I wish we can really get the project running like hell!

So first thing is that Vuforia project need Unity 32 bits. To do that, you have to either find a 32 bit machine or you need to find the 32 bit editor.

I will try to post some common knowledge here about Unity development.

First, how to source control your project:

https://unity3d.com/learn/tutorials/topics/cloud-build/creating-your-first-source-control-repository?playlist=17866

Make your Python experience the same as you work with Visual Studio!

So suppose you are a windows programmer and get used to the way Visual Studio arranges and debug code for you, when you get into Python, to set up a new IDE and debugging environment with pdb.set_trace() is really, how to say, a new experience that you may not work efficiently with. Today I found a plug-in for Visual Studio (multiple versions) that make python programming and debugging like you work with C++ in VS. Same debugging and even with Python interaction window! I have to say I love it so much.

So suppose you already have VS installed. Just go to HERE and look at the top right corner for the plug-in link. For VS 2013 and later please go to V2.2. During install, it asks about the Python library location, assign your already installed one to it. Then you can program Python with Visual Studio. You can even new a Python project with your previous python code. The tool will create two files in the same directory as your Python code, one pyproj file and one sln file. You can also follow the video below for more feature about the tool.

SIGGRAPH 2015 Day 2

On Monday after our poster presentation, we can fully enjoy the conference!

IMG_20150809_164633First thing I chose to do is to join the Panel talk offered from research leaders at University of Arkansas at Little Rock, Intel, Ford Motor, and Microsoft on the Topic “The Renaissance of VR: Are We Going to do it Right This Time?” In which, we know that VR is not new, all these veterans have tried on VR/AR even before I was born. The key information is that due to the hardware is achievable by normal people now, it may be a good chance for the VR/AR to get into people.

 

A great Keynote speech about what leads the graphics in the coming future from MIT Media Lab Director.
A great Keynote speech about what leads the graphics in the coming future from MIT Media Lab Director.

Secondly, I go to the large hall to listen to the Keynote speech offered by MIT media lab director Jochi Ito. Then I know that MIT media lab (MML) does not hair tenure professor since they want to keep the research active and new. In term of the research, MML focuses on iso-discipline area, which is the total empty space in the research. That is so cool. He also purposes the manufacture power of Shenzhen, China and the innovation from that region. I feel that it sounds like it is because Shenzhen does not have regulation on copy rights (sometimes rules become the boundary, but I still feel that the ignorance of copy rights is not a good sign for long term development).

 

The magicians of Industrial Light and Magic!
The magicians of Industrial Light and Magic!

The most amazing thing is the ILM 40 year anniversary! OMG it is like life dream comes true. I sat in the first group of chairs just below those big hero who

These are the people behind the first star wars!
These are the people behind the first star wars!

worked with the first Star Wars movie. They talked about how they make the first Star Wars, why they start the ILM at the beginning as to create the special effects, specifically about mechanic motors system to make capturing the same scene from same camera angles possible. In this way, multiple layers of footage can be obtained. Then the films can be composted as what happens now in digital version production. However, since the event only lasts about one and half hours, I think they talked too much about the old days. But at the end, ILM X Lab is announced with out surprise. Mr. Rob Bredow gives an amazing demo about how interactive high quality rendering can be achieved in the cloud and stream into the tablet to give more story from different characters’ point of view. I personally feel that ILM X Lab shows everything they have for the advanced movie production this time. But I still feel that expose so many details about one story line to the audience is still not a good way for VR/AR experience. Too much brain is used and we are looking for entertainment right? But without doubt, this is an amazing new direction!

Dream comes true with this talent artist + tech genius.
Dream comes true with this talent artist + tech genius.

In the afternoon, it is time for some academic topic! Face Reality technical paper section attracted so many audiences, including the supervisors from ILM and other studios. Four presentations covers a lot of the technologies on how to represent facial animation  either in real time or high resolution model sequences. The EPFL’s paper is really interesting. To follow the paper in more detail you can access the document at here.  And it is also amazing to say hi to my old friend Laura. And also have a chance to meet the super star Dr. Hao Li. His facial retargeting work with depth sensor, super amazing experience in ILM and Weta, and multiple hits on SIGGRAPH really make me speechless. To work with him as a post-doc really jumped into my mind during the meeting with him.

Then it is the reception, where the people meet and talk. I meet another amazing professor Mark Sagar from New Zealand. He is the leader of Baby-X project (as shown below).

FX Guide Phd course about Baby-X project

So nice he is, highly recommend to study with this MIT PhD at University of Auckland and of course, visit Weta!
So nice he is, highly recommend to study with this MIT PhD at University of Auckland and of course, visit Weta!

I got the information about Baby-X from FX Guide (Thanks for my colleagues from DreamWorks to tell me this amazing website!) At that moment I could not help and sent him a email to show my excitement about his ambition project. He comes to SIGGRAPH this year alone and I recognize him in the reception. He is really nice to share his work and we really have a good conversation. This is also the first time Baby-X is revealed in SIGGRAPH so I best wish him a successful presentation during the Real-time Live! event. And I also notice that the research leader of Microsoft also attends SIGGRAPH 2015! But that is another story I will talk about in next post.

Great Monday!!!!

My welcome to you.

Welcome to Xing Zhang (张幸)’s official webpage. I would like to share my journey after my Ph.D. from Graphics and Image Computing Laboratory at Binghamton University here, which includes Computer Graphics, Computer Vision, Virtual Reality, Argument Reality, VFX… basically, everything that I have passion about.

The first big news will be SIGGRAPH 2015. I have a poster accepted this year. It will be my first SIGGRAPH experience and I hope that I can learn a lot and keep attending from now on. Check the fast forward video out!